Should you take back your ex?

Blame Brad and Jen, but is revisiting a past relationship destined to give you breakup déjà vu, or should you keep those nostalgia-induced rose-coloured glasses on?
Should you take back your ex?
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Brooke Dallow -

There’s nothing like the potential resurrection of one of the most iconic couples ever to make you look at your ex in a new light! Before there was Justin and Hailey, or even Chandler and Monica, there was Brad and Jen, a couple so famous, so apparently perfect, that the Pitt and Aniston parts of their names weren’t required. But then, after 7 years of marriage, it was over. Fast-forward 15 (!!!) years – and a couple of divorces - and a touchy-feely red carpet rendezvous at the SAG Awards last month has the world practically salivating over the potential of the two of them getting back together.

If it happens, Jennifer won’t be the first woman to give an ex a second chance – even the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge called it quits before reuniting – but if it’s inspired you to hit rewind on a romance as well, how can you make sure it doesn’t end up the same way it did the first time around?

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Couples therapist and counsellor Nicola Beer says it’s about both of you being open and honest with your feelings about the past. “If you can see the mistakes or disengagement that led to the break-up, take ownership of them and keep open communication flowing, there’s a chance you can make it work,” she says. 

The first step on the road to getting your love back on track? “Set expectations for what you really want your relationship to be like and how you love to be treated,” Nicola suggests. “If you want it to work, be aware of any resentments you’re carrying and try to go of the past and move forward with love in your heart. You can’t let go of each other's resentments – you have to do it yourself.”

For Jennifer, that’s probably going to mean confronting those rumours about a cross over between her and Angelina Jolie – and being aware of repeat behaviour. “Nothing changes if nothing changes,” Nicola warns. “If you're going to brush issues under the carpet and carry on as before, is won’t work.”

So Brad, if you’re reading this: own your past. And don’t make the same mistake twice.

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