I remember when happiness and weekly highlights looked like festival tickets, all-nighters, and questionable financial decisions. My camera roll was filled with blurry concert videos, my bank account was perpetually fighting for its life, and my idea of self-care was ordering Hardee’s at 2am. Fast-forward a few years and somehow the thing giving me the biggest serotonin boost isn’t a last- minute holiday or a sold-out gig – it’s a new vacuum cleaner. Specifically, the Dyson DS60 Piston Animal Submarine. And before you judge me, just know that if you’ve ever caught yourself excitedly vacuuming a room just to admire the clean lines afterwards, you’re already on this journey too. Welcome to the age where powerful suction, spotless floors, and a freshly mopped kitchen are genuinely thrilling.

This isn’t your average vacuum. It’s Dyson’s most powerful anti-tangle cordless product yet. The real star, though, is the new dual-conical cleaner head that automatically ejects even the longest hair directly into the bin – which, as someone with long blonde hair that somehow ends up absolutely everywhere, feels revolutionary. On the sofa, in the bathroom, wrapped around every brush bar known to mankind… if I had to nominate one thing that could’ve been the downfall of my relationship, it would probably be the constant discovery of my stray hairs in places they had no business being. Thankfully, this Dyson deals with them before my partner has the chance to file an official complaint.

It also cleverly adapts to different floor types, switching between hard floors and carpets without you having to lift a finger. Add in LED lights that expose dust you didn’t even know existed (slightly terrifying, but useful), a wet- cleaning head for spills and stains, and a bin that actually compresses dust so you don’t have to empty it every five minutes.

And that’s probably how you know you’ve crossed over into full adulthood:
when a vacuum cleaner becomes both your favourite possession and your
most frequently discussed topic. At this point, the brand’s latest launch has
become my entire personality, and if you want to join the cult, the Dyson DS60
Piston Animal Submarine is available now across all Dyson stores in Dubai
and online for Dhs4,099 – and while younger me would’ve spent that on flights
and a series of regrettable online purchases, current me is convinced this is
the wiser investment.