1. Yes, you will love again

It seems near impossible at the moment, but someone will come along who you will feel attracted to again. And they’ll feel that way about you, too.

2. Lean on your friends, but not forever

The pain of a break up heals when it heals, and you can’t rush that. You get about a solid month of non-stop attention-seeking behavior for your friends, but then you have to start to scale back. They should be there for you with the support, the ice cream, and the voo-doo dolls as much as possible at the beginning, but if it starts to dominate every single conversation you have for weeks on end, that’s not super fair to them either. If you feel like you need more communication than your friends can offer post-break up, it might be a great time to look into therapy. 

3. There is no time limit in which you “have to” be over someone

Everyone has that one obnoxious friend with an ice heart who insists that you must be over them in approximately half the time that you dated them. People insist on these arbitrary deadlines for the #feels because having someone mke you feel bad on your heart seems endless, and it’s easier to deal with it if an end is in sight. But really, if you try to force it to end too early, it’ll just be worse. Let your sadness breathe and go away in its own time.

4. Also, that’s not wallowing

It’s healthy. Anyone who calls that “wallowing” has forgotten what breaking up with someone is like.

5. Try to stop hating him

But try not to hold onto that anger forever. Denying how you feel in the moment is pointless — if they cheated or hurt you, it’s going to elicit an emotional response. Don’t pretend you’re not fantasising about switching their shampoo with Nair (hair removal cream) if you are. Just try and let go of those feelings once the pain stops being so raw.

via GIPHY

6. Sometimes you need to sever all social and social media ties with the person (at least for a while) in order to fully move on

I know that makes it look like you “care too much” or whatever, but trust me, it’s better than Facebooking him when you’re lonely.

7. It’s not your fault

It wasn’t that you weren’t good enough for him in any way. There is no such thing. That is false.

8. Most of the time, closure is a myth

You probably won’t have that perfect closing-of-the-book moment that you see on TV. Don’t let Hollywood trick you into continuing to communicate with this person.

9. Don’t take your wrath out on his new girlfriend, who is a complete stranger to you

It’s Mean Girl-ish. If you must have the two-second thought that her hair looks flat and her Twitter isn’t funny, fine, I know sometimes you need to. But lashing out at women who have done nothing wrong, even just obsessing about his new girlfriend with your friends, is not who you are.

10. The horrible gut-wrenching process of getting over the first person you ever really dated and/or had a horrible on-and-off relationship with will make you #wiser

You will realise what you want and don’t want for your next relationship.

11. Your worth is not tied to another person

No matter who they are.

12. It didn’t work because it wasn’t right

This is the most important lesson, because it’ll help you move on and find a partner who is right for you.

H/T Cosmo US