How To Avoid Toxic People: An Unofficial, Official Guide

Because there are actual problems in this world
How To Avoid Toxic People: An Unofficial, Official Guide
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Look at them. Aren't they cute?

I’m just going to say this; we live in a society where looks and money rank higher on the importance scale than morals and personality and, where drama out ranks any form of sense and positivity. Hate me if you will, but girl, it’s true. I’m sorry.

For example, I will speaking to an acquaintance of mine and when I told her that a mutual friend of ours was getting married, she responded with three questions: “what does he do?”, “is he good looking?” and “how did a girl like X land a man?”  And, while her questions may not have been negative, they were rather vain and rude, don’t you think?

Another example; a friend of mine got a promotion and instead of saying “congratulations”, the people she told merely responded with glares and asked “what’d you do to deserve it?” Now, if that were me, I’d mentally give her a face five, on the face. In reality, I’d smile and work harder because that’s how you be the bigger person, in my book.

Another example; a really good friend of mine just celebrated her birthday and invited a bunch of her “closest” friends for dinner and a dance. During her party, one particular female, spent the entire evening whining that she wasn’t getting enough attention and, days later held her gift hostage until she got the attention she felt she deserved. Rather childish for a woman in her thirties, right? I think so, too.

Now, because we live in a world where people like the above are very much a part of our everyday lives and, with things like global warming and with a certain president, who likes building walls in charge of one of the biggest countries on Earth, there really is no place for unnecessary drama.

So, to help keep negative Nancy’s (as my mum would say), at bay, I’ve devised a list of ways to avoid said joy suckers while maintaining some form of social life and sanity.

Let’s begin…

If someone responds to your happiness with a glare…

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You should: Smile and slowly start distancing yourself from said happiness succubus.

Time to notice a positive change: Two weeks

If someone answers your question with another question…

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You should: Suggest they take up a career in politics or journalism

Time to notice a positive change: Three weeks

If someone makes your birthday party all about them…

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You should: Not invite them to the next one and reevaluate your friendship

Time to notice a positive change: One to two months

If someone is constantly putting down your romantic life…

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You should: Ask them if they are feeling a bit lonely and maybe buy them a book on how to be happy for other people

Time to notice a positive change: Two to three months

If someone belittles your skill set or job…

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You should: Remind them that it pays the bills and remember that everyone is good at different things. Also, stop paying for their percentage of the tab

Time to notice a positive change: Three weeks

If someone constantly criticises your looks…

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You should: Remind them that beauty comes from within and that your happy with the body that you were given – watch as that lovely human being begins to feel like a toad

Time to notice a positive change: Three to four weeks

If someone constantly complains that you don’t have enough time for them…

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You should: Remind them that you are trying to make a name for yourself in the work force. If you’re not doing that, you could always tell them that you are having some “me-time” and that a true friend would support that and wait until you are ready to hangout

Time to notice a positive change: One to two weeks

If someone holds your present hostage until you spend time with them…

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You should: Really just cut them off

Time to notice a positive change: One to two months

Right ladies, if you need any more advice, hit me up on Instagram. My team and I would be more than happy to help.

Chat soon and remember, your mama didn’t raise no doormat.

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